Monday, January 10, 2011

Confession

I don't want to graduate.

Next Tuesday will be the first day of my last semester as an undergrad. I will have managed to complete a four-year degree in... four years. And somehow, it doesn't feel right. I feel as though i should have stayed longer, tried for some harder classes, had a full-time job while I was in College. Maybe dated a little more.

But on the other hand, I can't complain too much about how things have gone. I went to a school I loved, found a great boyfriend, joined a fantastic sorority, choose a major that will be useful to what I want to do, and made great friends, whom I hope I will never drift away from.

And on top of that it will be great to be done with college, even if I do take more undergrad classes. I'll have my own apartment, which means that all of my belongings will be consolidated into one location instead of at two ends of the state, and I won't have to move once a year. On top of that I will find a job and start making progress towards acheiving my dream.

Still, considering  all of those things, I'm still not ready. I don't even know if I'll be able to find a decent job, one that will allow me to afford an apartment and living expenses. Living in the dorms has kind of been a sheltered experience. I never had to worry about food, I was on my mom's health insurance, and I could bum rides from friends any time I  needed to go somewhere not in walking distances. I also am unsure if my classes really prepared me for real life. All my teachers meant well, I have no doubt, but everything seems so theoretical.

Either way, I know I'll make it out in the real world alive. And I do still have one semester to prepare.

2 comments:

  1. I know I wasn't ready to leave college. However, I went back to my alma matter for homecoming and realized that I was over college-life. Still nostalgic about those days, but I have moved on to bigger and better things. It was bittersweet to realize this. Have FUN this last semester!

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  2. M,

    Once I'm done with college I'm sure I'll feel the same way you did. I'm even noticing some those feelings now, and wanting to just be an adult.

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